Sex on the Hill: McDaniel’s Porn Habits

Photo courtesy of Pixabay user stevepb.Photo courtesy of Pixabay user stevepb.

Ever heard those rumors that whenever the school’s Internet slows down it’s because too many students are watching videos on those pop-up inducing porn sites?

When I was told this I thought, “There’s no way that many people actually go on those websites.”  Well, since the Internet was being so slow, and I had nothing better to do except homework, I decided to find out for sure. I surveyed some students about their porn habits, and this is what I found out:

Five out of 14 students surveyed answered that they visit porn sites using McDaniel’s Internet about one or two times per week. Two out of 14 said they look up porn only once or twice per month.

Five answered that they never visit those websites (at least not with the school Internet), and two answered that this is a daily event. Everyone who answered “never” was female, and everyone who answered “daily” was male. Hmm. Interesting. I’m not sure what this implies about the two sexes, but it would certainly make an attention-grabbing topic for anyone wanting to do a paper on gender studies.

In addition to the frequency of visits to porn sites, I also wanted to find out – without going into too much detail – what it is that people are searching for? When asked what their preferred medium choices for porn were, most chose video as opposed to photos and text. Well, I suppose if everyone is streaming those videos at once, that could explain the lag with the Wi-Fi, but I’m still not convinced it’s any more their fault than it is the fault of everyone watching Netflix.

In fact, six of the students who were surveyed actually preferred to read their porn. Though the majority of these readers were women, there was one man who sided with those who prefer the sexual textual stimulation. Nobody chose photos as their favorite form. Obviously, it’s because they don’t use up enough bandwidth.  Maybe I should have asked about people’s preferences towards GIFs and Vines.

In regards to what sites people are using, there is a shockingly large assortment. The most commonly used website seems to be Pornhub, while others include xHamster, RedTube, YouPorn and “Whatever loads fastest after a google search.”

We still don’t know for sure if the occasional sluggishness of McDaniel’s Internet is caused by students’ use of porn sites or not. But now we have proof that you’re probably not the only one who has been using the school’s Internet for some extracurricular learning. If you know what I mean.