McDaniel Introduces Undead Education Rights
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published on April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] In a surprising move earlier this month, McDaniel College made the…
2017
Students Create Cult to Lower Tuition
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published on April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] With rising tuition costs, students have begun to enact drastic measures…
Student Discovers Possible Unicorn Horn on Campus
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published on April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] The McDaniel College community has been divided by tensions due to a…
Student Switches Seat After Semester is Half Over
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] On Monday, freshman Mark Reynolds made the decision to sit at…
Sodexo to Offer New Theme Nights This Spring
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] In an effort to offer a wider variety of their somewhat…
In Mix-Up of Unprecedented Proportions, Student Athlete Presents on Supply-Side Economics at Centennial Conference, Runs 400 Meters at Maryland Honors Conference
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] McDaniel student-athlete and honors student Pete Pandowski is able to run…
An Interview With One of McDaniel’s Highest Earning Alumni, XXXNoScopeBeast1993XXX
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] McDaniel College has a number of notable alumni, including news anchor…
Wealthy Students Humbled by Living in McDaniel Hall
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] A new wave of housing woes has fallen upon select residents…
Non-Athletes Show an Interest in Campus Sports
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] In an incredibly unexpected turn of the tides, students have been…
Student Chooses to Become Hobo Rather Than Pay for Housing
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] McDaniel students have discovered yet another innovative idea for saving money…
Roman Life Gains Traction on Campus in Midst of Greek Life Decline
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] It’s no secret that Greek life on campus has been in…
Movie Review: Legally Blonde
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] Ah, yes. What a classic. “Legally Blonde” challenges our views about what…
Student Hopes Anti-Theft Alarm Won’t Target Him
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] “I just don’t know what’s going to happen to me when…
Spellcheck Conspires Against Student
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] Starting in the fall semester of 2017, McDaniel College will no…
Administration Apologizes for Tuition Hikes
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] For years, students and their families have endured rapidly increasing postsecondary…
Where’s the Free Press?
[Disclaimer: This article was originally published for April Fools’ Day, and it should not be interpreted as factual reporting.] Dear Free Press, For years you have provided me with a…
Intramural Sports Seek Teams, Players for Spring Session
Intramural sports registration will begin closing in waves on Sunday. Volleyball, which plays its games on Monday and Wednesday nights, will close its registration Sunday. Dodgeball, which plays on Tuesday…
What Students Do Off Campus
McDaniel offers a wide range of on-campus activities for students to take part in. These include clubs, student government positions, Greek life, and arts and culture shows/exhibits. Although there are…
McAdvice: Pomodoro
Amid the busyness throughout the second half of the semester, students run on caffeine, pub runs, and other substances that should not be mentioned in front of authority figures. Students are cramming…
Bravely Bald: A Story of Hair Loss and Illness
Seventh grade and finding bald patches. Seventeen and watching clumps of hair fall from her fingers into the drain. 40 years old, advanced ovarian cancer, and a bald head under…